This will be the second time I say goodbye on the CE word press. Back in 2012, when I was an intern, I wrote something simple and dramatic, because, I admit, I have a taste for dramatic entrances and exits. I think I quoted Jefferson’s dying words, “Final words are for those who haven’t said enough!” Silly. Pretentious. Tongue in cheek.
I’ll try to refrain from anything like that today. I think I was just trying to be clever. No attempts at cleverness. I’m trying to be genuine here.
When I first started as the Managing editor I was hopeless. I was so scared that of screwing everything up that I would wake up in the middle of the night from a nightmare that involved a client slapping me with a heavy manuscript because I returned her edits a day late. On one occasion I actually leapt out of bed to check my e-mails just to be sure there wasn’t a client e-mailing me at 4 am in desperation because her deadline was four hours ago and I was nowhere to be found. More often than I messed up the process of coordinating with clients and editors. I forgot which editor worked with which client. Sometimes I forgot to send crucial e-mails that pertained to a specific section to which a client wanted extra attention devoted. In regards to my bumbling and messy assumption of this job, I would first like to thank all the editors for bearing with me. Second I owe a profound apology to Daniel, my predecessor for dealing with every one of my idiotic e-mails with questions so basic I can’t believe I had to ask them at one point.
For those first two months, Daniel was my personal e-mail hotline. What should I charge this client? This person just e-mailed me about doing a developmental edit, do we even do that? I imagined Daniel rolling his eyes when he saw another e-mail come in with the subject line “HELP URGENT!”
By the way, there were days, days when I knew for sure all the ships were sailing straight in terms of clients, that I came into the office only to find 15 e-mails screaming at me, “where are my edits, where are my edits.” The first one starting at midnight and then each subsequent e-mail being sent within a half hour of the previous one. “I know you must be asleep but I just really need you to send me my edits—THIS IS TOTALLY UNPROFESSIONAL I NEED MY EDITS NOW—I’m sorry I yelled, I’m just under a lot of pressure.” It’s a lesson in humility. Even when you think you’ve got all the bases covered and think that you’re the master of your domain, the world will conspire to knock you off your pedestal
But for the most part I got the hang of things. By September I felt at least somewhat competent in my position and I found it rewarding. It’s interesting to be the focal point of information and people. It’s like being a ship’s captain. You’re just steering the boat and trying to keep it on its course. I admit I started to develop an ego, even though I wasn’t doing anything but sending out manuscripts, papers and invoices, and negotiating with clients. The heavy work is all done by the editors. Still I felt like I was depended upon. I kept telling myself, there are people out there that rely on you to tell them what to do, to ensure that they get what they asked for, and that the people you work with are being sent the proper instructions so they can do their job. Thankfully there were more than enough head deflating moments along the way.
So all that’s left to say is, goodbye. It seems strange that now when I’ve just got the hang of thing, I should be leaving. I feel like this year was one that I did a whole lot of learning. Dr. Weiner has been a great mentor over these past months and it has been a delight to work with her. I hope this business continues to grow and I know it will. I wish everyone the best of luck and hope our paths cross again in the future.
Former Managing Editor